"You Deserve The World My Darling"

I have only lived for sixteen short years, but sometimes it feels longer. Because I am young I lack in wisdom and discernment. Not that I am incapable of being wise and making good choices but more I haven't lived long enough to know. But that is the beauty of growing up. I believe that mistakes, if we learn from them, are a good thing. The more mistakes we make, the more wisdom we gain. I'm not saying to go out and do all this crazy stupid stuff so you can have more wisdom. Because that within it's self is far from wise. I'm saying not to beat your self up for the mistakes you have made and will make. Rather learn from them.
I have made my fair share of mistakes and poor choices. I am no innocent in the matter. Allow me to elaborate. About this time last year, I was five months into a deep and meaningful relationship with a great guy. He was my best friend. We talked everyday, multiple times a day. We knew each other so well we could predicted one another almost perfectly. He knew everything about me. He knew every inch of my life in the past and he knew every inch as my life happened. He was my go to guy. As close as we were and as much as I deeply adored him, we never had a romantic relationship. Though everyone thought we did. When I first met this guy a about a year earlier, we clicked instantly. We just got along far too well. But I am an introvert and I had never had a close guy friend. I held back for a long time. We went to youth group together and most of our friends were seniors. So when they graduated they moved on and we were left. This forced us to grow closer. Fast forward to this time last year and we were closer then close. But as time passed I fell hard for this guy. I had only had one other guy care about me like this and I feel for him too. I finally worked up the nerve to tell him I had developed deep feelings for him and he turned me down. It hurt but I expected it. I continued to purse him. As time went on the closer we got, the closer we got, the more we fought. Now this guy is a naturally flirtatious person. Since I liked him so much, and he was so flirtatious, we did not mix well in that aspect. It just got worse and worse. I started blowing my problems out of proportion to get more attention from him. He started getting weighed down by me. June of 2016, it all blew up. We finally both crumbled. We didn't talk for a month and then two and then three. I'd text him every once in a while to make sure he was still alive but that was it.
 In September I started internet dating a different boy. We "lasted" for two months and he broke up with me.
The purpose of these two stories is this, during both of these relationships I found myself doing anything to make these boys like me. I would change the way I thought, dressed, spoke etc. I wasn't myself with these guys. But no matter how hard I tried to be the girl they wanted, I never could succeed. I ended up hurting myself and they went on their merry way. Here I am only two and a half months later and God has shown me so much.
The first guy and I sat down a number of months later and worked everything out. We are still friends and talk on occasion about the wonderful things God is doing in our lives.We have a good friendship. The second guy and I never really talk. He promised me he wouldn't date for a few years and less then two months later he has a new girl. I'm not bitter or mad. I'm actually glad because I'm not tied up in him anymore. But I pray for his new girlfriend continually.
I think these two relationships were mistakes. But I learned so much from them.
If I could say anything to the girls reading this, I would say,
don't settle for guys who don't care. Running yourself dry for a boy who does not even care about you, only hurts you. You are worth so much more. God has handpicked the right guy. Who will chase after you with all his heart. No guy who won't chase after you but make you chase after him, deserves you. You deserve the world my darling!